Parenting Advice and a Grain of Salt

When you have a child, be it your first or third, you will find yourself receiving ample amounts of parenting advice.  This advice will come from anyone and everyone, including parents, people with no children, grandparents, the gas station attendant, the checkout bagger... you name it.

This advice can range anywhere from telling you how you should feed your child (breastfeeding vs formula feeding), how you should discipline your child, how you should deal with your child's sleeping (co-sleeping vs crib-sleeping/etc), whether or not they should have a pacifier.  The list truly goes on and on.

Not too long ago, Megan and I went to Target to pick up a few odds and ends for around the house.  Now, Megan turned 2 in December, and I still let her have her pacifier (which we call a binky).  After doing a lot of research on pacifiers and toddlers, I found that they will actually do no harm to a child's orthodontic structure until they start getting their permanent teeth.  With this in mind, I have put off the fight with the Princess over her "Binky" until she is potty trained.  She has no other "lovey", no blankie, so the pacifier is all she has to calm herself and soothe.  She usually only gets it when cranky/tired or sleeping, and on this particular trip, cranky didn't even begin to cover my child.  While checking out, Megan told the lady helping us "thank you", and the lady reached right over and pulled her binky out of her mouth, while saying "You're too old for this, you just take that right out," and tossed the pacifier towards my purse in the cart.

Rather than starting a huge scene, I calmly pulled the pacifier out and gave it back to my child, who looked completely crushed that this woman had taken her sacred binky away.  The woman gave me a dirty look and went on to advise me against all the evil ways of pacifiers, right down to the fact that I was setting my child up for a life of failure.  I merely thanked her, took my receipt, and walked out of the store.

While inside I was seething, as this is my child, therefore my parenting decisions, it's best to just nod and smile where these advice givers are concerned.  They either:
a) have your child's best interests in mind
b) believe in the advice they are giving wholeheartedly
c) are just being a busybody and getting in your business

So just say thank you, take their advice with a grain of salt, and as my soldier husband would say "drive on".  When it comes to your child, you are their parent, their advocate, and the expert on what they need.  Do not let anyone make you feel guilty for making a parenting decision that you feel is in the best interest of your own child.  So long as you are not putting your child in harm's way, no one but you and your partner are to say when your child needs to give up a pacifier, a blankie, breastfeeding, or diapers.

Stick to your guns, because if you feel it's right, then it most likely is.