Single Parenting Can Be Lonely

I've been through a deployment once before, but at the start of that time period, I was a brand new mom.  Every day was a new adventure as I watched my newborn turn into a rolling, crawling and walking toddler.  There were small bouts of loneliness, but I had moved back to live in the town I grew up in, so I was a few miles from my family, and went out with other mom's and their children weekly.

I'm not saying that watching my child grow through this deployment is any less of a joy.  I love my daughter dearly, and she is a joy (most days :P) to be around!  But I will say that the growth isn't nearly as significant and mind blowingly fast as her first year of life.  Along with that, I'm in a strange city where my closest family is a 17 hour drive away, and I have very few friends.  Of the friends I do have, none of them are in the same spot in life that I am.  Their children are older, they're more independent, outgoing, or they don't have children at all, so I always feel the slightest bit awkward because Megan goes everywhere with me.

But I am lonely.  I miss my husband (though his companionship can be much the same as our child's some nights :P), and I miss having an adult conversation every night.  The worst thing about surviving through a deployment for me is the lack of conversation.  Luckily I do have the internet, and friends I talk to daily on there, but it's still not quite the same as sitting down with a glass of wine and chatting with a good friend, my husband, or my family.

It's okay to feel this way!  Single parenting (because you ARE single parenting while your spouse is deployed) is difficult.  If you're away from family you have no one to fall back on for a much needed break and stress relief.  That in and of itself can be lonely.  Take up a new hobby, go visit family, learn where things are in your city to try and find a safe haven for you to visit to get out of your house.  Getting out of the house is important.  I find that I go to the store a lot more than I need to because I crave adult interaction, and it makes my child happy because she gets stimulated by something other than our own house.  Take walks around the neighborhood!  Grill outdoors.  Change your scenery, stimulate yourself.  It will help ease the loneliness.  I promise. :)

When all else fails, take a trip to visit some close family or friends.  Get away for awhile, take a break.